Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Season 1 - Episode 15 - Act II

Just as Sarah had anticipated it was a bit awkward to be standing around with Terry’s friends without Terry.  He’d done well though and Steph’s date, Nick was ten shades of hot.  Mel’s date, Gordon was a little shorter and a little less cute but still hotter than most of the other guys standing outside of BHS. 
Still, a tux did wonders for even the ugliest guy, and Willy almost looked decent.  Ok, not really but it was a good effort.  He was still fat and full of zits but at least his jacket hid his probable pit stains.  Vani looked cute though and Sarah told him so.
“Thanks!  I’ve decided that from now on I’m always gonna wear a tux.  And I’m also gonna fight crime in my spare time.  I feel like James Bond or you know, Austin Powers.”
“You look more like Mini Me,” snarked Karl.
Karl looked great.  He’d cut his hair at Sarah’s request and it really helped to bring out his blue eyes.  His bow tie was green though, which Sarah should have expected, since he always wore green but somehow she hadn’t thought ahead and they kind of looked like Christmas standing together since her dress was red.  They still looked good though and she’d already gotten a lot of compliments on her backless gown. 
Finally Terry and Cerise showed up and Terry and his hockey buddies all shook hands like they were business men or something.
“Oh my god, Cerise, you look so good!” gushed Mel.
“I know, totally!” agreed Steph.
“Oh my god, you too!  You all look amazing!  Sarah, you’re so hot!”
“You too!” giggled Sarah.  “Nice legs.”
“Thanks!” laughed Cerise.  “I love your hair!”
“Yours too!”
“But like, you and Karl kinda look like Christmas…”
“Shut up!  I know!”
“That’s hilarious!”
“I know!”
They nonchalantely separated themselves from the boys and lowered their voices while Terry and his friends talked about the Stanley Cup or whatever.
“Oh my god, Terry looks so hot, I’m gonna die,” said Steph.
“Totally!  He looks like a spy,” agreed Mel.
“Your guys are hot too,” said Cerise.  “Like wow.”
“I know!  I’m so happy!”
“Me too!”
“Even Karl looks good,” smirked Cerise.  “The haircut does wonders.”
“I know, right?  I made him cut it,” said Sarah and then her eyes widened in horror.  “Oh my god, don’t look.”
“What?”  They all spun around to see the most hideous dress in existence. 
Porta-potty chick was wearing some sort of purple torture device that made her look even fatter than usual. 
“God, what a loser,” hissed Mel.  “She came with her parents.”
“I can’t believe she came at all,” sneered Steph.
As much as they all hated Porta-potty girl it was really a sad sight to see.  Sarah felt nothing but pity as the poor thing waddled up to the school and stood around awkwardly while her parents went inside.  The Glue Sniffers, totally underdressed ran up to her and pushed her around, calling her a giant grape and a purple turd. 

            “What.  The.  Fuck?!” said Erica loudly.  “That is the grossest thing I have ever seen!”
            “Seriously, what the hell?” said Christina.  “She looks like she’s in a big fat purple wedding.”
            Everyone laughed, including Jay but he didn’t think it was very funny.  Sure, Porta-potty did look retarded but he was sick of hearing those bitches laugh.  All through the car ride they totally gave him shit and Karine just sat there ignoring it.  So far this prom was nothing but suck.  Jay tried to take Karine’s hand but she pulled away and he tried to stand next to her but she kept ignoring him.  It’s like she didn’t even want people to know they were here together.  She went to talk to Terry Hunkofshitsky and Jay slunk over to the boys.
            “Hey, look who decided to show up,” said Karine with a smile.
            “I told you I’d be here,” said Terry brightly. 
            “I know, but I hardly believed it.  You’ve been in such a funk lately.”
“Yeah, we made up.  Isn’t that awesome?  Doesn’t she look great?”
            “Yeah, sure,” nodded Karine, looking over at Cherry.  She had to admit the girl did look ok.
            “Check out her legs, isn’t she hot?” Terry gushed.
            “Yeah, she’s on fucking fire.  So shall we go in?”
            Karine put her hand on Terry’s arm and led him towards the school.  He looked back at Cerise and waved at her to join them. 

            “The hell?” sneered Mel.
            “Seriously,” agreed Steph.  “Someone should tell Karien to stick with her own date.”
            “Yeah except she’s here with Jason Harris, like can you blame her for not wanting to hang with him?” snickered Mel.
            “I know, totally.”
            “I almost died when I heard her and Steven broke up.”
            “I know, they were voted most like to get married!”
            “I know, it’s so ironic!  And now Steven is with Christina.”
            “You’d think Karine could find a better date than Jay though, I mean no offence, Cerise, I know he’s your friend but like really?  They so don’t match.”
            “I know, it’s so weird, right, Cerise?”
            Cerise smiled tightly and nodded.  “Yeah, it’s majorly messed up.”
            “And now Erica is with Andrew,” Steph went on.
            “What is with them?  They are so into musical boyfriends it’s not even funny.”
            “Whatever, Andrew Lester is a total man whore.  I bet he ends up with someone completely different tonight.”
            “Yeah, maybe me!”
            “No, me!”
            Mel and Steph laughed at their own grossness and Sarah had to remind them that they already had hot dates.  They joined up with their guys and walked into the school.  Terry found Cerise in the hallway and she took his arm as they peered into the gym.  It looked pretty good, all decorated with balloons and streamers.  Everyone’s parents stood against the walls and listened to Principle Lewis explain that they would usually begin the evening with the graduation square dance but it had been vetoed this year so instead they’d have a processional march.  He announced their class and they all walked into the gym to the sound of applause. 
            Cerise was proud to walk in with Terry.  She hadn’t thought her sisters were planning on coming but there they were standing next to their mom, gawking at Terry.  Cerise took a significant amount of pleasure in seeing Karine walk with Jay.  She obviously wanted nothing to do with him and he looked miserable. 
            Poor Shauna had to walk in alone.  She really did look horrible. 
            “This is Cerise,” said Terry, introducing her to his mother.
            “Hello Sareesse,” his mom smiled.
            “No, Cerise, the S like a Zed,” he explained.
            His mom kept trying to get the pronounciation but couldn’t quite manage it.  Oh well, she’d been called worse things.
            Terry’s step-mom Vicky was there too but there was no sign of his father.  Just as well, Cerise knew Terry hated his dad.
            Everyone looked rather uncomfortable when it was announced that they’d start with a father-daughter, mother-son dance.  Jay’s mom was smiling happily but Jay looked like he’d rather be dead.  Shauna was clearly about two seconds away from puking all over her dad.  Cerise joined Karine, who was standing against a wall.  They nodded to one another but didn’t speak.
            Burst into flames, burst into flames, burst into flames!  Shauna kept repeating the mantra, hoping it would work but no one burst into flames.  Once the dance with her dad was over Shauna had to stand around like a loser, while everyone else danced with their dates.  Apparently Cerise was back with her huge boyfriend and she was hanging all over him like they were getting married.
            It was about an hour of agony before the parents finally left and the real prom could begin.  Everyone shuffled outside to climb onto the busses headed downtown.  They were going to the Ritz-Carlton or something but now that her mother was gone it was easy for Shauna to sneak away.  She hid behind some bushes while everyone piled onto the busses or got in their limos.  Cerise got into her boyfriend’s car and they sucked each other’s faces off before they drove away.
            Shauna knew that everyone thought she was Cerise’s stalker.  But it seemed like she had a stalker for real ‘cause some lady was sitting in the parking lot, totally taking pictures of Cerise and her boyfriend with a spy camera, like one of those things with a huge lens thing.  It was totally weird.  Maybe Shauna should get a spy camera.

            “Ooh, casino, how fun!” enthused Mel.
“I know, totally!” agreed Steph.
Why did they sound so surprised?  Everyone knew it was gonna be a casino theme. 
It was a pretty swanky place.  One room had casino tables and another held the dancefloor, which was surrounded by dinner tables where they’d have a meal.  They shuffled in and took their places.  Terry had to hand it to Sarah; she’d been in charge of placecards and she’d made good choices in the seating arrangements.  Terry and Cerise were seated with Sarah, Mel, Steph and their dates.  But Karl Weber was at one end of the table, his seat next to a table that housed Hangman and the fat dude along with some other losers.  Terry’s seat was next to Karine’s table, so he could lean back and chat with her if he wanted.  Unfortunately her table also held that stupid Jason Harris hair guy and his seat was close to Cerise’s.
“Not bad, man, not bad,” said Scheffer, regarding Mel as she ran off to the bathroom with the rest of the girls.
            “Yeah, my chick’s ok too,” agreed Morgan.  “But you’re right about them being chatty.  Holy shit, man.”
            “I know, eh?” laughed Terry.  “Sorry, man.”
            “Well hopefully we won’t be talking all night,” grinned Scheffer.
            They all laughed and made a few crude jokes before the chicks returned.  Dinner was one of those fancy meals where they never give you enough food.  Terry had to eat about a thousand bread rolls just to quell his hunger.  
            “Hey Terry, wanna dance?”
            Terry turned to see Karine smiling at him.  She really looked great tonight.  He told Cerise he’d be right back and took Karine to the dance floor. 
            “You look good in formal wear,” she said as she put her hands on his shoulders. 
It was a slow dance.  He held her waist and returned the compliment. 
            “I wish we could dress like this all the time,” she said.
            “Ehh… I dunno about that.  Although Cerise does look pretty good.”
            “See that flower in her hair?  I gave it to her.  Looks nice, eh?”
“God, look at her.  I don’t know why she doesn’t wear skirts more often.  Check out those legs!  And that ass!  Holy shit, eh?”
            “I’m surprised she didn’t show up in dominatrix gear,” Karine grinned.
            “Shut up,” he blushed.  “I didn’t tell you that shit so you could use it against me.”
            “Oh, I thought that’s what you were into, having things held against you,” she teased, pushing him forcefully with her hands and grinding up against him.
            “Ok, ok, fucking hilarious,” he laughed, gently pushing her away.

            What the frakking frig?!  Karine was practically giving Terry a lap dance.  And everyone noticed.  Terry’s hockey buddies made jokes about him getting action and the Green Girls all loudly announced their shock.  Jay looked like he wanted to cry.  For a second Cerise almost felt sorry for him but then remembered that he was a total piece of shit. 
            Finally the dance ended and Terry came back to Cerise, putting his arm around her and kissing her cheek.  Karine continued to ignore Jay and went to check out the casino room with her friends.  Jay went to sit with the guys.  They were making bread sculptures out of the dinner rolls and hitting each other with the fake flower centerpieces.  Their debauchery spread and the hockey dudes got in on it, throwing bread and flowers at each other across the tables.  It actually was kind of funny and the girls got in on the act too.

            “So where is she?” asked Ben as he and the other Glue Sniffers wandered around the dinner tables.
            “Dunno, dude,” replied Mike.
            “Well we can’t let this shit go to waste,” said Wendy, holding a can of dog food.  “We have to throw it at someone.”
            “How ‘bout that fat dude?  Willy Wonka or whatever.”
            “No man, we gotta save it for Porta-potty bitch.  Let’s find her,” insisted Wendy.

            Shauna wandered aimlessly, knowing she couldn’t go home.  Her mother had set her curfew to midnight and didn’t want to see her any earlier.  She entered a playground and sat on a swing, kicking off her boots and squishing the sand between her toes.  With effort, she untangled her hair from the bun her mother had forced it into and let her stringy hair fall over her face.  Her mother had also forced her to carry a little purse, which was dyed purple to match her dress but came out sort of pinkish instead.  She threw it to the ground and kicked it around, trying to play hacky-sack with it, not that she knew how to play hacky-sack. 
Cerise was probably dancing with her boyfriend, having the time of her life.  She was maybe even fucking him by now, in a hotel room and like everyone was watching and it was a total orgy and all those assholes were there gang-banging her.  Fucking slut.

            Cerise and Terry were on the dance floor with the Green Girls and their dates and Sarah and Karl and Vani.  They were all dancing in a group.  Karl sucked pretty bad and Gordon wasn’t much to look at either but Terry and Nick and Vani were really into it.  Terry and Nick were good dancers but Vani started doing all these goofy moves and Nick and Terry went along with the joke, being all goofy themselves.  When it switched to a slow song Vani stayed on the dance floor and started doing the robot.  It was pretty amusing. 
            Terry wrapped his arms around Cerise and held her close.  In her heels she reached all the way up to his eyes and it was a lot easier for them to kiss comfortably. 
            “I guess you chose the high collar so I couldn’t give you hickeys?” he asked as he slipped a finger inside her collar and stroked her neck.
            “I guess you’ll just have to find other places to kiss me,” she giggled.
            “Oh I will,” he breathed, pushing his tongue into her mouth.
            “Yo mutha-fucka!”
            Cerise pulled away from Terry as Andrew smacked him on the back.  Terry laughed and accepted the flask that Andrew offered him.
            “God, reinforce the stereotype even more, Andrew,” snarked Cerise.
            “What?” he asked dumbly.
            “Nothing,” she sighed.
            “Come on, Cherry, live a little,” said Andrew, grabbing Cerise’s waist and trying to pour the contents of his flask down her throat.
            “Hey, hands off, dude!” exclaimed Terry, pushing Andrew away from her.        
            “Dude, let’s play blackjack!”
            Terry took Cerise’s hand and dragged her to the casino room.  She followed grudgingly. 

            Sarah poured herself some punch and offered a glass to Karl.
            “No thanks, I think Andrew Lester spiked it, like he’s in frakking American Pie or something.”
            “Since when are you Mr. Follow the rules?”
            “It’s not about rule following.  It’s about not being a degenerate slob like these plebes.”
            “But no offence, right?” Sarah asked, sipping her drink.
            “Uh, right,” he smiled weakly.
            They went to the casino room where Terry and Cerise were playing blackjack with Andrew.  Erica and Karine were playing poker and Christina and Steven were wandering around trying to choose what to play.  It was so weird.  Sarah had always imagined Chrissy and Steven would make a good couple since they were both much nicer than the rest of their friends but somehow they didn’t work out in reality.  They looked totally uncomfortable together and were barely even making eye contact.  Steven kept looking at Karine, obviously still pining over her and Christina was looking at Andrew although her expression was harder to read.  She always looked mildly pathetic so it was hard to know what she was feeling.

            “So where’s your date, Karine?” purred Erica.  “Oh there he is, at the loser table.”
            Karine followed Erica’s gaze to a roulette wheel where her date and his dorky little friends were throwing chips at the casino guy.  God, it was so hilarious!  Jason fucking Harris!  It couldn’t have been better if Erica had planned it herself.
            “So did you lose a bet or what?” Erica went on.  “I mean that’s the best you could do?”
            “Get over it.”
            “Truly pathetic, Karine.  Truly pathetic.”
            Karine narrowed her eyes.  “I may have come with Jay but I’ll be leaving with someone else.”  She nudged her head towards the blackjack table.
            “What, Terry?  Yeah right.  He’s back with Fruity Pebbles.  Never gonna happen.  Face it, Karine.  You’re done.  Now that little Steven has finally seen the light you’re just done.  Terry is never gonna want you and neither is any other guy.  You peaked in like, Sec 3 and now you’re done.”
            Karine smiled sweetly.  “I never said I was going for Terry.”
            She walked to the blackjack table and placed her hand on Andrew’s back.  Oh hell no!  Erica may have let Andrew believe that he could hook up with Karine tonight but she never thought it would actually happen.  Andrew was Erica’s fucking date and it would be over her dead body that he would leave with anyone but her tonight.  It was on! 

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