Monday, November 21, 2011

Season 2 – Episode 6 – Act III

            Somehow Cerise managed to steer the conversation away from sex and towards Star Trek, a subject she was much more comfortable with.  They decided that First Contact was the best of the movies and when Cerise ordered him to blow up the damn ship he protested by attacking Cerise with a pillow.  They struggled for a while until he let her overcome him and she celebrated by stretching out on the couch, resting her legs on his lap.
            She was acutely aware that she was recreating her first meeting with Terry, right down to the couch on which they were sitting but this experience was different because Tom wasn’t self-confident enough to give her a foot rub.  Oh well, at least he could discuss Star Trek intelligently.
            “So how come when he breaks his little ships it’s such a revelation for him?  He looks at his little broken models and that turns him around?  I never got that,” Tom confessed.
            “It made him think of the destroyed Enterprise D and he’s all, hey, I’m not even on my original Enterprise.  And I guess it’s not so bad if another one gets destroyed ‘cause it’s about winning the war, not the battle.”
            Tom seemed stunned.  “Oh, really?  That totally makes sense.  You’re smart.”
            She giggled and decided that yes, she was smart and could totally choose what would happen next with Tom.  She was in complete control. 

            Terry had met up with Andrew at Clyde’s and they’d played pool as usual and ogled chicks as usual and drank copious amounts of beer as usual.  Or rather, it was no longer usual but once had been.  Honestly it wasn’t quite as much fun as back in the day and Terry wondered if maybe it would be worth it to dump Andrew in favour of getting back with Cerise.  But no, it wasn’t so much about Andrew himself as the principle of the thing.  Besides, he was footloose and fancy free now and this was the perfect opportunity to get some tail, something he hadn’t done in ages. 
            They rated the chicks in the room and Andrew set his sights on the one he considered hottest, although she wasn’t really that hot in Terry’s opinion.
            “You just like her ‘cause she seems the most desperate.  I mean she’s practically wearing a bikini she’s so not dressed and it’s like, November so it’s like, not even seasonally appropriate so it’s like pretty obvious she’s a total slut.”
            Andrew stared at Terry in disbelief.  “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
            “Whatever, I want a chick who’s more… I dunno, pretty.”  He was about to point out a girl with short blonde hair but then thought better of it, realizing he was just picking the chick who looked most like Cerise.  He scanned the crowd and picked someone as far away from Cerise as possible, but still cute.  “There, her, the black chick there with the big tits.  I’m going for her.”
            “I’m so over black chicks,” groaned Andrew.  “They’re like, totally stacked but they’re always bitches.  I mean always dude, always.”
            “Well I’ve never been with a black chick so I’ve gotta fill the quota, right?” smirked Terry, acutely aware of what a racist asshole Cerise would accuse him of being at this moment.
            “No doubt, man, no doubt,” nodded Andrew.  “But give the bitch a fake number ‘cause fuck, you don’t want her calling you.  Trust.”
            Terry agreed and off they went to catch their prey.

            Julie basically knew she was a loser for doing it but she still went to Terry’s house even though he was totally her sister’s ex-boyfriend and it was totally gross and incestuous and lame to try and get with him but still, he was totally hot and totally worth it if he’d go out with her so she might as well try even though she was seriously nervous and totally second-thoughting the idea to bring him homemade cookies, which was like totally lame and 1950s and shit, right?
            She held her breath as the door opened and Terry’s little brother, whose name escaped her at the moment, appeared looking confused.
            “Jules?” he asked.
            Wow, how totally embarrassing.  He totally remembered her name and she had no idea what to call him.  “Hey, yeah, hi,” she smiled.  “Um, is Terry here?”
            “You wanna see Terry?”
            “Um, yeah?  I like, brought him some cookies.  I made them myself,” she said lamely.
            “You made cookies for Terry?” he looked incredulous.
            “Like um, yeah?”
            “Uh,” she paused, wracking her brain for the answer.  “I dunno.  I haven’t seen him in a while. I was wondering how he was doing.”
            “Oh.”  He stared at her.  “Well he’s not here but I am and I like cookies too.”  The way he smiled was totally like Terry’s smile.  Totally hot!
            She stepped into the house with a giggle.

            Was it something to do with that couch?  How come every time Cerise came to Karine’s house she hooked up with some guy on her living room couch?  It was pretty clear they’d be hooking up before the night was over.  Cerise has her legs draped over him and he was holding her knees, rather awkwardly, what a loser, and they were laughing and talking excitedly and stuff.
            Another successful party, Karine supposed.  Janice had apparently recovered from her fall and was now dancing with a bunch of random guys Karine couldn’t identify. 
            “So you wanna dance?”
            Karine turned to see that Peter was still with her, having followed her into the room.  She’d totally forgotten about him.  But why?  He was totally hot in his own way.  What was Karine’s deal?  She said she was in too much pain to dance, which was true but mostly she didn’t feel like it.  There weren’t any seats left in the room so she strode over to Cerise and her embarrassing flirtation with that Tom guy.
            “Use up all the couch space much?” she smirked.
            “Oh sorry,” said Cerise, straightening up.
            She and Tom scooched to one end of the couch while Karine sat down, with Peter snuggling up next to her.
            “That good?” asked Peter.
            “No, but it’s fine,” Karine said dismissively.  At this point she was more interested in eavesdropping on Cerise’s retarded conversation with nerd boy.
            “I always thought Picard and Dr. Crucher should have gotten together,” she was saying.
            “Well they did in the possible future in All Good Things.”
            “Yeah but we never got to see it.  I just thought they should be together especially after they got psychically linked in that episode where they get psychically linked.”
            Peter was nuzzling Karine’s neck and she thought for a moment that it was kind of rude of him to try to pick her up when she was clearly still in a lot of physical pain.  Then again, it had been awhile since she’d gotten her neck nuzzled and it did feel pretty good.
            “Yeah really, there’s all that tension and then it just fizzles,” said Tom.
            “I know!  These mega revelations and then nothing.  It’s like, why didn’t you ever tell me you were in love with me?”
            “You were married to my best friend.  But he’s dead now so screw it!”
            And then Tom actually kissed Cerise and she kissed back.  Wow, way to go nerd boy.
            “That would’ve been a better ending!” said Cerise with a giggle, totally missing the opportunity to get some action in favour of talking about nerd shit.  “Hey, Data, what were you thinking about just now?”
            “Haha!  Cat food!  Just like in that poem you wrote, cat food kissing!”
            “Exactly!  It’s all about Data.  You know, that guy got a lot of action for an android.  I mean he got more than Geordie ever did.”
            “Hah, but that’s not saying much!” laughed Tom.
            “It’s always the wacky characters who get the most action.  Like in Voyager it was the doctor.”
            Seriously?  Was Cerise seriously talking about Dr. Who now or whatever, instead of making out with this cute guy who was maybe not actually cute but definitely nerd cute?  It was so pathetic.  Karine adjusted herself so she could get a better view of their little interaction and nudged Peter away as she did so. 
            “Your back hurt?” he asked.
            “Yeah.  No.  Peter, no offence or anything… but I don’t know if I really wanna do this.”  She smiled, trying not to sound bitchy.
            “It’s because I’m black, isn’t it?” he asked wryly.
            She laughed.  “No!  Shut up!  It’s just… I don’t wanna have some meaningless hook-up.  I’m not into that kinda thing anymore.”  Yeah, that sounded good.  It was even true.
            “Who said I wanted a meaningless hook-up?  Karine, I’ve had a thing for you since sec 4.  I’d be into… you know, having a real relationship with you.”
            Karine was speechless.  He sounded completely sincere and that was actually genuinely endearing.
            “If you’re not into me it’s cool.  I can take it.  I mean, I’ll just convince myself that it’s another case of the white man brainwashing the white woman into rejecting the black man.”
            She laughed again.
            “It’s just the white man trying to keep us brotha’s down.  Know what I’m sayin’?” he said, suddenly sounding like a gangsta stereotype.
            Karine laughed appreciatively.  “I’m not saying I don’t wanna get together with you.  I’m just saying... I mean, what if we took it slow?  ‘Cause I mean, I’m thinking these days, I should go about things differently than I used to.  ‘Cause the way I used to do things, you know, they didn’t always work out so great for me.”
            He smiled, revealing perfectly straight, glowingly white teeth.  He was kind of a pretty boy, wasn’t he?  Well Terry was kind of a pretty boy, so wasn’t that her type?  He assured her that they could take things slowly if she wanted to. 
            Karine looked over to Tom and Cerise, who were still talking about whatever the hell lame ass nerd stuff they were into. 
            “So uh, how slow is slow?” Peter asked.  “Should I start investing in an RRSP or what?”
            She laughed yet again and then kissed Peter and it was actually perfectly pleasant, except for the ridiculous background noise.  Were they seriously going to talk about nerd stuff all night?
            “All his spirituality crap was so dumb.  It’s like, you’re in space, stop being so cosmic.  All his beliefs were like, whatever.  It was so forced.  Hi, I have a spirit guide, let’s play with my medicine wheel.  It’s like, unless you’re on North of 60, I don’t wanna see it.”
            “That’s so politically incorrect,” laughed Tom.
            “But that’s the point, they were trying to be so progressive and like, sensitive to Amerindians or whatever but it was so forced and unnatural,” said Cerise with more passion that Karine had ever heard before.  “They just didn’t know what to do with him.  Every week he had a new thing. Oh, I’m into palaeontology, I like boxing.  Now I’m a Mars buff and I’m stealing Tom Paris’ shtick.  Pick a thing and stick with it.”
            “He had diverse interests,” laughed Tom.
            Karine kept making out with Peter as Cerise flipped out.  Something about how it was totally lame to like Choco-tay or whatever.  Tom said he was cool ‘cause he got with seven.  Seven what Karine wasn’t sure.  Cerise felt that was the most ridiculous thing ever because Seven, who was apparently a woman, was supposed to be hairy or something.
            “Harry Kim?” laughed Tom.  “He was a putz!  I mean come on, Harry and the Kimtones?”
            “Oh my god, Tom!  You are Harry and the Kimtones!”
            “Oh my god, you’re so right.  Shit!  I’m such a loser!”
            “No you’re not.  I liked Harry,” Cerise said with a voice suddenly seductive.
            “Oh yeah?  Wanna see my clarinet?”
            Wow, ok, nerd double entendres were totally lame.  Karine couldn’t help but laugh and Peter asked her if he was amusing to her, doing his best Joe Pesci, which made her laugh all the more.  It took her a second to notice that Cerise and Tom were now completely making out.  Well, good for them.

            Terry was already inside the girl when he realized he didn’t really want to be there.  As a result, he paid no attention to his performance and ended up coming rather quickly.  He pulled out with embarrassment and tossed the soiled condom into a nearby trash can.  The girl covered her hand in a Kleenex and fished it out, mumbling something about not wanting her mother to find it. 
            They were in the girl’s bedroom and her parents were out for the evening but they’d be home soon, so could he perhaps be on his way?
            Terry wondered if she was trying to get rid of him because he’d been a bad lay.  Great, now he was going to get a bad reputation in the black chick community.  Not that they had a forum or anything.  Or maybe they did, Terry didn’t know.  He certainly hadn’t made any effort to get to know this girl.  At this point he couldn’t even remember her name.  They hadn’t even exchanged numbers.  She was just a girl, an anonymous chick like any of the dozens he’d hooked up with in high school. But this time had been different because he hadn’t even been trying.  It had been as easy as ever.  A smile, the gift of a drink, a quick chat about this and that and whatever the hell.  Then back to her place - walking distance from the bar - for some brief foreplay and then no more than a minute of penetration. 
            “I’m sorry I didn’t last longer,” he said half-heartedly.  “Usually I last longer.  I guess I’m kinda drunk.”
            He was completely sober.  Completely cognisant of the fact that he’d just had bad sex with a random girl and the whole time he’d been thinking about Cerise.
            He offered to go down on the girl, to get her off.  He owed her that much.  He couldn’t very well leave without even trying but she wasn’t into it.  So he walked back to Clydes and drove home.  He would be going right past Karine’s house on his way, might as well drop by, just for the hell of it.  But no, even if he did see Cerise, he didn’t want to talk to her when he reeked of some other girl’s perfume.  Cerise didn’t even wear perfume.  Didn’t need to.  She smelled great no matter what.
            When he got home he almost thought he could smell her.  He found an open tin of cookies in the kitchen; Cerise’s cookies!  Had she been here?  Brought them by as a reconciliatory gift?  He stuffed one in his mouth and chewed happily, running upstairs, poking into rooms, yelling for his brothers.  He burst into Evan’s room without knocking.
            “Hey, Evan, did Cerise bring those cook…”
            “Get the fuck out!” Evan yelled from his bed.
            On her knees, in front of him, sucking his cock was a blonde head and just for a second he almost thought it was Cerise but no, it was her sister, Jules.  For the first time in his life Terry knew what it felt like for all the people who had walked in on him doing stuff.  It had never bothered him much when he got caught but being the one doing the catching was different.  It was more embarrassing somehow.  He didn’t even leave the room, as he knew he should, he just stood there, aghast.
            Jules turned around and licked her lips while Evan frantically covered his diminishing penis with a pillow.
            “Hi Terry,” she smiled.
            “Jesus Christ, Evan.  She’s fifteen!” he replied.
            “So am I!  Now fuck off!” Evan screeched.
            Well that was a fair point.  Terry closed the door and walked back downstairs.  He’d certainly been having sex at fifteen, sometimes with girls a year younger.  He had no grounds to give Evan shit.  Still, it was so weird.  Jules seemed like such a little girl.  Cerise was only two years older but she seemed so much more mature.  For the first time Terry wondered how old the chick he’d banged tonight had been.  He hadn’t even asked.  He’d just sort of assumed she was the age she looked, which was about eighteen, but maybe she was just a high school kid.  Some girls developed early.  Karine had fully developed breasts when she was just twelve. 
            Not for the first time, Terry thought about those early years of high school, when he and Karine had become really good friends.  When her father died and he’d comforted her.  He’d thought they’d get together but he didn’t want to push it, what with her grief and all.  And then Steve had swooped in and they were joined at the hip.  What if it had been him?  Well, maybe if he’d hooked up with Karine all those years ago it would have ruined their friendship.  Or maybe they’d still be together, which would mean that he’d never have hooked up with Cerise.  This thought saddened Terry so much that he resolved to make up with her as soon as possible.  He’d give in and give up his friendship with Andrew and everything would be ok.  So what if he was pussy-whipped?  It was worth it to be with her again.  Should he tell her about the girl he’d been with tonight?  No, best not to add fuel to the flame.

            Cerise and Tom were practically eating each other’s faces off.  It was pretty sick and totally hilarious.  Karine joined Cassie and Janice as they watched from across the room.
            “Way to go, Tom,” laughed Janice.
            “Oh my god, I’m so happy for him!  He’s been wanting this all semester.” squealed Cassie.
            “I dunno though.  Total rebound for her,” noted Karine, ever the voice of reason.
            “Not necessarily.  She and Terry have been broken up for like, a month.”
            “That’s like, nothing!” insisted Karine.
            “Oh come on,” drawled Janice.  “It’s a pretty long time.  I’ve never waited more than a week between boyfriends.”
            “Boyfriends?  They’re not called boyfriends unless you go out with them more than one time, Janice.”
            “You callin’ me a slut?”
            “No, just a whore.”
            “Ok then,” Janice cackled.
            “Anyway, Cerise isn’t like that.  She takes this kind of thing seriously.”
            “God, what-ev-er.  The girl has been funked out for ages.  She just needs to get laid and we all know it.”
            “That’s not how she is.  And like, her and Terry were together since high school.  And they’ve broken up before and gotten together again.  So it’s like, pretty major for her to hook up with someone else.  And that’s why you know, this might just be a rebound thing.  ‘Cause like, her and Terry are like, a thing.”
            “What is it, like a soap opera?” laughed Janice.
            “Pretty much,” admitted Karine.
            Cassie stepped in.  “Well her and Tom are kind of a thing too.  They like, always hang out together in class and like, outside of class too and she’s like, a total groupie for his little band and like, I dunno.  I think she might actually be into him.”
            “Hey, don’t get me wrong, I encourage it.  Her and Terry being together never leads to anything good.  It’s like, total progress for her to like, hook up with someone more her speed.”
            “They do kind of like, match,” nodded Janice.
            “Totally.  Way better than her and Terry,” said Karine, agreeing with herself.
            “Oh!  She’s spotted us!” Cassie squealed as Cerise looked up and blushed, realizing she was being watched.
            The three girls looked around nonchalantly but there was no looking away when Cerise took Tom’s hand and led him out of the room.  He seemed stunned, slack-jawed and tripping over his own feet as he followed her upstairs.  Karine, Janice and Cassie scrambled to watch them ascend the stairs without making it obvious that they were spying.
            “Oh my gosheroonies!  Someone’s hooking up!” laughed Janice, loudly enough that everyone in the vicinity looked over.
            “Eww, they’d better not go to my room,” grumbled Karine, eliciting giggles from the crowd that had since turned to watch Cerise and Tom disappear upstairs.

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