It was bad enough that Jojo was gaming with them now but why had he brought Cavity along with him? The little midget and his girlfriend descended into Jay’s basement and plopped down onto the floor like they’d been doing it for years. Granted, Jojo used to play with them when they were kids but you’d think he’d be more awkward to rejoin them after being officially kicked out. Did he have no shame? Maybe he thought he was the shit now ‘cause he had a girlfriend, which was admittedly pretty cool.
Not that Jay would ever admit to being jealous of Jojo, who was still the biggest loser ever. But still, Cavity was pretty cute, even though she was starting to get in the way, all acting like the owned the place. How was it that some people always seemed confident and secure no matter the circumstances while others felt ill at ease even in their own homes?
Not that Jay was uncomfortable but it was a lot to take in. At this point Lee had pretty much taken over the game, hogging almost as much air time as Vani. And now they were allowing Jojo to resurrect his old character and even Cavity wanted to create one! When she’d started hanging out with them it wasn’t so weird because she could hang with Cerise but after a week or so of keeping her place Cavity was making everything about her.
Vani patiently tried to steer things back to himself and his efforts to commandeer a ship, but there was nothing for it.
“I have to roll a dice thingy, right?”
Jay could see Karl trying hard not to roll his eyes.
“Yeah,” nodded Cerise. “You need to roll for a ton of attributes. But you need to choose a character first.”
“Ok so anyway, I’m in the ship,” Vani went on.
“Do I have to read all these books?” wondered Cavity. “Can you choose one for me?”
“Silence!” Vani bellowed. “I’m trying to destroy Betazed!”
They’d found a planet of telepaths, so they called them Betazoids, even though Karl insisted there was to be no Star Trekking in this universe.
“Which I still disagree with,” Cerise fruited. “I don’t see what your big damage is with the Betazoids.”
“They’re telepaths! They must all be destroyed!”
“They know what I’m thinking!”
“Is it as scary for them as it is for us?” asked Lee, totally saying the joke Jay would have said before Jay could think of it.
“So they know you’re trying to kill them,” Cerise pointed out.
“Which is why I have no time to lose! Battle stations!”
“So can I like make a character while Vani’s killing the Betazorns?” asked Cavity.
“Yeah you guys, can Cassie make a character?” pleaded Jojo in a whine that reminded Jay why’d he’d been expelled from their group so long ago.
Karl sighed deeply and closed his eyes briefly, as though every bit of his willpower was at work trying not to throttle these poseurs. “Yeah I guess. What do you wanna be?”
“I dunno, what are my options?”
Even Cerise seemed a little exasperated by the question and Vani rightly pointed out that the options were limitless.
“Ok, relax,” Cavity snotted, perhaps offended, or perhaps just naturally bitchy. “Why don’t you just give me an existing character to play if making a new one is so much trouble?”
It was an insanely stupid idea and yet probably their best bet. Cavity would no doubt last only a couple of sessions at best, so no point in creating someone just for her to die two seconds later. Willy echoed Jay’s thoughts but agreed with the plan, pointing out that Cassie was unlikely to return to this dank hellhole ever again.
“What does that mean?” she asked, not defiantly but genuinely confused.
“Girls have no dedication to the game.”
No reply was needed since the irony was obvious but Cerise had to pull out her feminist card all the same. “First of all, I resent that implication. And second, Willy, you shouldn’t talk Mr. Comatose half the time.”
It was finally too much for Karl. He told Cavity to read the Rifts manuals and to brush up on her Stargate and tried to get back to Vani and his Betazoid killing but the midget’s girlfriend handled the books like they were made of dog vomit.
“Oh, just give Cassie a red shirt and let’s get on with it,” Cerise sighed.
“Why do I need a red shirt?”
Jay really and truly hated the world and everything in it. But then he kind of had to eat his words, or his thoughts rather, as he’d never admitted aloud that he didn’t want Cavity and her girlitude messing up their game. In any case Cavity turned out to be pretty good with a die and seemed to grasp the rules of the game quite well. She indeed started playing some random NPC soldier and completely rocked it. She even got all crude and stuff, all yelling at the rest of them when they didn’t roll as well as her and swearing up a storm as she blew the brains out of various bad guys. And she was pretty hot while doing it. Too bad the character she was playing was a guy ‘cause otherwise Jay might have made a move on her with his character. Well, no, he obviously wouldn’t have because that would be weird, especially with Jojo being there, and Cavity being sentient and everything but still. If her character had been female then Jay could have at least fantasized about their characters getting together in the privacy of his own brain. As it was he’d have to settle for a more realistic fantasy of them getting together in real life. Not that that idea was actually more realistic but whatever; it was a bit of new material for the spank bank.