Karine couldn’t even remember the last time she’d had so much fun. She was totally drunk, which was totally Christina’s fault, ‘cause like Chrissy was like totally making her match her drink for drink and they were dancing and having the best time! The bar was totally packed, which could be annoying with all these guys trying to feel her up and stuff but she didn’t even care ‘cause it was so fun!
After a while though, it wasn’t so fun anymore. Karine staggered outside and threw up on the sidewalk, which was like, totally gross, ‘cause all the snow was gone. Puking in snow was better than puking on concrete.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this drunk,” giggled Christina, holding back Karine’s hair.
“I’ve seen you this drunk,” Karine giggled back.
“Hell, I’m that drunk right now.”
“You need to puke?”
“Nah, I can hold my liquor, I ain’t no amateur,” Chrissy boasted.
They walked for a second and then sat down on the windowsill of a Thai restaurant. “Fuck, I think I’m done,” said Karine, her head pounding. “I wanna go home.”
“Yeah, I’m good. Let’s go.”
“I don’t wanna a bus. It’ll take forever.”
“Let’s get a cab.”
“Yeah, I guess, except cabs are gross. Why’d we even come to Ste-Anne’s? We could’ve just gone to Clydes and like, walked home,” Karine sighed.
“I totally suggested Clydes and you were like, no, you hate that place.”
“Oh right. Yeah, I do hate it.”
“Well so, a cab then?”
“I’m gonna call Terry.”
“Good idea!” agreed Chrissy.
This phone was so stupid! It was like, totally impossible to even get to the place where you put in the phone number, god! Finally she clicked on Terry and the phone dialed.
“What’s up?” he answered.
“Why are you yelling?”
“Terry, oh my god!” she screamed into the phone.
“Are you drunk?”
“You need a lift home, don’t you?” he asked, all judgemental, like he’d never been drunk before.
“Yeah,” Karine tried to sound less like she was drunk, and more like she was just wanting to hang out for fun times.
“Where are you?”
“God, you don’t have to yell!”
“Karine, I’m not gonna drive all the way to Ste-Anne’s just to drive you to Beaconsfield! I’m in NDG, for fuck’s sake!”
“I thought you were in Kirkland. Visiting your dad or whatever.”
“That was yesterday. I’m home now.”
“Ehhh,” Karine whined. “But what am I supposed to do?”
“Take a bus or a cab. What’s the big deal?”
“Terry! I’m feeling really sick. I just puked. I don’t wanna take a bus with a bunch of stinky people and like, I don’t wanna take a cab with like some gross guy.”
“Oh my god!” Terry said in exasperation. “Call Nick. He lives in Kirkland.”
“He has a car?”
“He has access to one.”
“Ok, thanks, bye!”
“So I guess he’s not coming,” said Christina in disappointment.
“He lives in NDG now, with like, his sister’s mom. She like, divorced his dad and he like, hates his parents or whatever. It’s a whole thing. He says we should call Nick.”
“He’s totally hot.” She dialed and the phone rang and there was no answer. So she texted a few times and then called again.
“Karine? What the fuck! It’s like fucking one in the morning! I’m fucking sleeping. What the fuck do you want?”
“Nick! I need a lift home! I’m at Annie’s and I’m all like drunk and sick or whatever.”
“Are you fucking serious? Are you being fucking serious right now? You wake me up so I can fucking drive you home? You ever heard of fucking taxis you fucking bitch?”
“He’s like totally pissed,” giggled Karine to Chrissy as she held the phone away from her ear. “But cabs are gross and Terry said you’d help,” she said sweetly.
“Seriously?! I’m gonna fucking kill him.”
“Nick, come on! Oh my god!”
“I swear to god I’m gonna fucking kill Terry on Monday and I’m gonna kill you too. Fine, I’ll be there in a bit.”
“Thanks! You’re the best!” She hung up and smiled at Chrissy. “He’s coming.”
“Who is he?”
“Terry’s hockey friend.”
“So Terry lives with his step-mom?”
“Didn’t I tell you the whole thing about Terry finding out like how his mom isn’t his real mom and how like, his real mom like totally abandoned him and divorced his father and he married his mom, I mean like, his fake mom, like you know, like, the one he grew up with and she like, raised him and they never told him the truth. He like discovered it by like finding these old pictures of his real mom and it’s a whole thing.”
“I know, it’s totally crazy. So he was like all pissed and shit and he like moved out and everything and he like moved in with his step-mom to like, keep taking care of his sister and stuff.”
After a moment Chrissy asked if Terry was still with Cherry.
Karine was surprised Christina had managed to restrain herself from asking until now. “Oh my god, I can’t believe I didn’t tell you. They like, totally broke up. And it was like, epic. He totally dumped her ‘cause like, she liked this other guy and then she went out with that other guy, like Jason Harris, you know from high school? That like, total loser? Right, so they go out and then like he dumps her like five seconds later and then Terry is all like, pissed so he punches him in the face and he has a broken nose and shit and Cerise tries to get back with Terry ‘cause she thinks if he hit Jay he must still like her or whatever but he was like, nope, totally over you and she’s like, all sad and shit.”
“Sad for Cerise I guess, but fuck, her name is so stupid,” Chrissy snorted in derision.
“Totally,” Karine nodded.
“So then Terry’s single?”
“Yeah,” Karine confirmed with a sigh.
“You think he’d go out with me again?”
Karine laughed and then shrugged apologetically. “I mean, yeah, totally, probably, why not? Sure. Anything’s possible I guess.”
“But I thought you were over him. Besides, we’re supposed to be guyless for a while!”
“Yeah but like, it’s Terry,” said Christina. “Besides, I’ve already been single for like, a way long time!”
“But we agreed to be single together!”
“Yeah well it’s not like he’d go out with me anyway.” Christina slumped her shoulders in defeat.
“Yeah, probably not. Even though him and Cherry are broken up he’s still all into her. Fuck, he never gets over her! She needs to become ugly or something. Or you know, uglier.”
They both burst into a fit of giggles.
“She’s not actually ugly though,” Christina sighed.
“I know. But we’re both prettier.”
“And we have bigger boobs!”
“Yeah!” laughed Christina, shoving out her chest.
“And we’re not named after fruit!”
They were still laughing when Nick showed up. He got out of the car and helped them get into it.
“Hey!” Karine clasped her arms around his neck. “Nick, this is Chrissy. Chrissy, Nicky.”
“Hi!” she said brightly.
“It’s just Nick,” he said with a sigh.
“Oh my god, he’s so hot!” whispered Christina from the back seat, before Nick got back in the driver’s seat.
“I know but he’s gay,” Karine announced just as he was taking the wheel.
“Am I taking you guys to different places?”
“No, Chrissy will sleep at my house,” said Karine with finality.
“You’re totally hot,” said Chrissy, slumping back into the leather of Nick’s parents’ car.
“Thanks,” said Nick. “I’m still killing you on Monday for this.”
“I love you too,” said Karine, closing her eyes and wondering if she should bother brushing her teeth before going to bed.