Thursday, March 21, 2013

Season 3 – Episode 9 – Act III

            “So you guys kissed?” asked Nick with great interest.
            “Yup, but I stopped it,” nodded Terry as he drove downtown, making his way towards the village.
            “What?  Why?” asked Nick, horrified.
            “Yeah, why?” Karine piped in from the back seat.
            “Well ‘cause,” Terry said.  “I just don’t trust her.  I think she still has feelings for ass-wipe.”
            “Yeah, I agree with you,” said Karine.
            “Oh she does not!” said Nick with irritation.   
            “Well she hates me!” said Karine.  “She was a total bitch to me in rehearsal!  Apparently it’s the same old story.  Jay dumped her ‘cause he’s into me and Cerise was all bitter about it.”
            “She was mean to you?” asked Terry, not even sure if he was surprised.
            “Well, she snapped but then apologized I guess,” said Karine.  “God, I dunno.  Girls always do shit like that.  Like blame me for shit.  Remember when Cassie and Sarah were all hating me?”
            “Yeah, gee I wonder why,” snorted Terry.
            “What the fuck does that mean?”
            “You do have a way of manipulating situations, Karine,” he chuckled.
            “But I didn’t fucking do anything in this case!” Karine snapped.
            “And Cerise apologized so don’t shit all over her!” Terry snapped back.
            “Yeah, and you don’t still have feelings for her,” drawled Nick.
            “Still don’t fucking trust her though,” Terry sighed.  “Ok, where am I gonna fucking park?”
            “Try up on Sherbrooke,” suggested Karine.
            “Fuck!  How come you can’t fucking turn left in this town?!” Terry growled as he tried to navigate the tight streets.
            “Still, I feel like everyone is always hating me all the time.  Especially Cassie, god I’m so over her!”
            “Stop being such a girl,” said Nick.
            “Oh fuck you!  You wish you could be a girl!”
            “I’m not trans, bitch.”
            “Well I’m not a bitch, tranny!”
            “Except you are,” snickered Nick and Terry laughed too.
            “Well fuck!  Maybe I am!  Maybe I will go out with Jay, just to like, show them!”
            “Show them what?  That they’re right about you?” asked Nick in amusement.  “Oh there, there’s a spot!”
            “God, whatever,” said Karine.  “Like I’d ever go out with such a tool.”
            “Yeah, seriously, don’t even joke about that, Karine.  I seriously would not be able to handle it if you went out with Jason Harris and his Bozo the clown hair,” said Terry, pulling into the spot Nick had pointed out.
            Nick jumped out to check the parking signs and then shot Terry a thumb’s up.

            This was so much fun!  Karine had never been to a gay bar before and it was just as she’d imagined, based on what she’d seen on TV.  A lot of guys were dancing with their shirts off and holy crap, they were hot!  Why couldn’t straight guys be that hot?  She supposed some were, but they were always the douche bags.  Perhaps that was true of gay guys as well; the hotter they were, the douchier.  But everyone here came across as really nice and friendly and no one was being rude to her just ‘cause she was a woman.  In fact, several guys had complimented her on her outfit.  This was awesome!
            And Nick seemed to be having a good time.  Terry too.  In fact, Terry seemed to be enjoying himself more than he had in a long time.  He was drinking and dancing and maybe even flirting?  Wow, Karine was impressed.  He wasn’t being homophobic at all.  Not that she was surprised, but still. 
            They congregated near the bar and topped up their drinks, Terry pointing out a cute guy for Nick to ask to dance.
            “Meh, not my type,” Nick shrugged.
            “What’s wrong with him?” asked Karine.
            “Too old.  Most of the guys in here are like, in their 30s.”
            “There are plenty of young guys,” Terry said.
            “Besides, maybe you should go for an older guy.  Like sugar daddy style,” winked Karine.
            “Gross,” said Nick, sticking out his tongue.
            “Ok, that guy,” said Karine.
            “Are you kidding?  He’s a midget!”
            “That guy?”
            “A giant.”
            “That guy?”
            “Too white.”
            “That guy?”
            “Too pretty.”
            Both Karine and Terry glared at Nick.
            “Are you being this picky on purpose?” asked Terry.  “’Cause like, you’re scared or something?  I mean fuck, if I was in a room with this many chicks I’d be able to pick one in two seconds flat.  Especially if so many of them were topless.”
            “Well I guess you’re just not very discriminating.”
            “I guess I’m not chicken-shit of hooking up with someone.”
            “Come on, don’t be so hard on him,” Karine counselled.  “Think back to when we were discovering our sexuality.  It can be scary.”
            “I was never scared,” scoffed Terry while Nick cringed in embarrassment.
            They discussed it a while longer but finally Terry lost patience and walked up to the guy who seemed least objectionable.  They talked for a while and after a moment came back to join Nick and Karine.  They all danced together, with the guy getting pretty friendly with Nick, who was obviously still embarrassed, but getting into it all the same. 

            “Why am I even here?” asked Cerise as she walked into Cunningham’s with Sarah and Cassie.
            “You need to have some fun,” replied Sarah.
            “Yeah, a girl’s night out will do you good,” confirmed Cassie.  “One without Karine,” she added bitterly.
            “God, don’t go back to hating Karine,” sighed Cerise as they sat at a table.  “It’s really not her fault Jay likes her.”
            “Of course it is!  She’s done plenty to encourage him!”
            “Even if she did, it’s still his choice to leave Cerise,” said Sarah.  “Ok, explain again how Willy is involved, ‘cause I don’t even get it.”
            “I’m not sure I get it either,” shrugged Cerise.  “Except to say the guys always get involved when it’s none of their business.”
            “No shit!” exclaimed Sarah.  “It’s like they’re so fucking bored with their own lives they have to create drama around them!  I mean even Karl does it.  He fucking loves to see others suffer.  It’s ridiculous.”
            “Yeah, it really is,” nodded Cerise. “But we knew that about them.  We’ve known it for years so it’s not exactly surprising.  They’re little shit-starters and drama queens.”
            “Well it’s all for the best in the end,” said Cassie.  “I mean, we all tried to go out with Jay and it didn’t work out with any of us, ‘cause like, no matter what his friends did, it’s really up to him to be a decent boyfriend and he just wasn’t.”
            “He’s incapable of it,” nodded Sarah.
            “Too bad he’s so funny.  And cute,” sighed Cerise.
            “But totally on crack,” smirked Sarah.
            “On Karine crack!” said Cassie angrily.
            “Don’t blame Karine,” said Cerise.  “I mean, she pisses me off too sometimes but it’s like you just said, it’s Jay who’s incapable of being a good boyfriend, regardless of what she does.”
            They all stared at one another.
            “You really were good in theatre today though,” Cassie smiled.
           
            Terry and Karine sat down, having hovered around a table for a full half-hour, waiting for it to be vacated.  They watched Nick dancing with that guy and hey, now they were kissing!
            “Oh my god!” squealed Karine.  “So cute!”
            Terry shrugged and nodded.  He was glad Nick was getting some and also pretty proud of himself for not being grossed out by any of it.
            “You’re not grossed out?” asked Karine, echoing his thoughts.
            “Why would I be?” he smiled.
            “Dunno,” she shrugged.  “Hey, is it really a thing with guys to be like into two chicks together?”
            “Yeah, I guess so,” Terry nodded. 
            “Why?  I mean, is it just a voyeuristic thing?”
            “Well yeah, but I guess it’s also like, you put yourself in there too.  ‘Cause like, one chick is hot… and two chicks is hotter… and two chicks with me is even hotter and so on.  I mean, as long as they are in fact hot and not all old and fat and nasty or whatever.”
            Karine nodded.  “Does it turn you on to think of a chick you’re into being with another chick?”
            “Yeah, I guess,” said Terry.
            “Ok, back when you were with Cerise, did it turn you on to think of her with another chick?”
            “Yeah I guess.  If I imagined it I always put myself in there too.”
            “Is that something you’d really want?  A threesome?”
            Yes indeed it was but Terry wasn’t sure if that was something Karine wanted to hear so he just shrugged. 
            “Do you still imagine it?” she went on.  “Like does it turn you on to think of her now with another chick?”
            Where was she going with this?  He decided to make a joke and say he wasn’t into it if the other girl was gonna be Porta-potty chick.
            “No but seriously,” Karine laughed.
            “It doesn’t turn me on to think of her with anyone but me.”  He stopped and considered it a moment, imagining Cerise with a faceless hot chick. Yeah, it was hot.  “Yeah I guess it’s a turn on to think of her being with another girl, just in a general sense.  I mean, in a fantasy way.  I think if I found out she was like, suddenly gay and fucking other chicks I’d still be jealous, same as if she was fucking other guys.”
            Karine nodded.  “Speaking of other girls.  Have you ever fantasized about me?” she asked.  She didn’t seem to be flirting, but rather asking an honest question, genuinely interested in the answer.
            “You know I have.  I mean, I used to be into you, back in high school.  You know that.”
She smiled and nodded and he went on.  “Sometimes I’d think about you joining me and Christina.
            “Eww! Really?”
            “Yeah, and back before I got to know Erica I even thought about all three of you getting it on.”
            “Eww!”
            “Is it really that gross?” he asked with a grin.
            She shrugged.  “I dunno.  Doesn’t turn me on.”  She paused for a moment and then went on.  “Do you still fantasize about me?”
            “No,” he replied.  Karine was undeniably hot and he knew he’d have sex with her if there was a guarantee she wouldn’t get all weird about it; if he knew for sure she wouldn’t develop feelings for him, but it wasn’t worth the risk.  If they were to sleep together things would definitely get weird and he valued her too much as a friend to mess around with her.  So it was better if she believed he never thought about her in that way. 
            She nodded, but seemed disappointed by the answer so he asked if she ever fantasized about him.
            “Yeah,” she laughed.  “Sometimes I’d imagine you when I was with Steven.”
            Terry laughed as well, glad they were talking about years ago and he didn’t have to worry that she was pining for him or something.
            “Do you ever think about what if?”
            “What if what?” he asked hesitantly.
            “What if you’d never met Cerise?”
            “Then we might’ve gotten together?” he asked.
            “Yeah,” she said neutrally.
            “I’m glad we didn’t.  ‘Cause you’re my best friend.  And it’s best if we don’t fuck around with that.  You know, literally.”
            “Yeah, totally,” she agreed with a smile.
            They looked at each other and he wondered if they should hug or something but then she laughingly asked if he’d ever fantasized about her and Cerise together.
            “Nah, that’s just fucked up,” he lied.
            “Really?  You never thought about it?  Not even once?”
            “I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that my answer might be yes.  But, I mean, I only ever thought about it in the way that I’ve thought about every fucking woman I’ve ever met and every conceivable combination of women I’ve ever met.”
            “You are one horny fucking guy, Terry,” she laughed.
            He nodded and turned to look at Nick, who was full-on making out with that guy from the dance floor.  “Holy shit!  You can totally see that guy’s hard-on through his pants!  Fucking nasty.  You’re supposed to hide that shit in public!”
            “Maybe that’s not how it works in gay bars,” mused Karine.
            “I guess Nick is getting lucky tonight.”
            “Nick doesn’t have a hard-on though.  We sure he’s gay?”
            Terry smirked.  “He just has the decency to wear pants that don’t show everything.”
            “This was a nice thing you did,” Karine smiled.  “Getting Nick out here.  Helping him hook up.  You’re a good friend.”
            Terry shrugged, feeling embarrassed.  “Hey, everyone needs a little somethin’ somethin’ every so often.”
            “Yup, we all do,” she agreed.
            Was he really such a good friend, genuinely helping Nick or was he just trying to get Nick to stop bugging him about Cerise, distracting him by forcing him to get his own love life?  Maybe it didn’t matter.  He did want Nick to be happy and at this particular moment he seemed to be, so mission accomplished, Terry supposed.

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